Friends, who agrees with me that it is okay, to not be okay?
Especially when you are talking to a friend. But when you are talking about yourself, are you still willing to give yourself the grace to know (that it is okay, to not be okay)?
I want you to know it’s okay to say, “I am not okay”. It takes courage to say, “I am not doing well: I need some help.”
Friends, if you are not ok, I want you to know I am here (and I know there are others in your circle sitting waiting to be an open ear.)
Someone in your circle has been put in your path by God to help be your friend and partner in the struggle.
Don’t be afraid to ask for:
an ear to listen,
arms for a hug,
shoulders to cry on,
a house to watch your child,
a meal to drop off at your house,
or a chick-flick, glass of sangria or brownies with ice-cream type of night.
I know I often struggle to stop and ask a friend, a neighbor, and let’s be honest as a military spouse sometimes it has to be an acquaintance (that can soon be a very close friend) for some help.
And honestly as a military spouse, we have to be willing to even ask an acquaintance for help because we are new to an area and haven’t made any new friends yet.
Why is it that so many of us are this way?
How easy is it, and how often do we walk by someone (at church for example) and the conversation will sound like this:
“Hey! How ya doing?”
“Good, how about you?”
“We’re doing good.” (while your soul is screaming, I AM NOT DOING OKAY!)
“Awesome, see ya ‘round.” (And you think to yourself as they walk away, another lost opportunity to get some help.)
Hmmmm… how often are we truly doing good? What does “doing good” even mean? If we are truly doing good, is that even where we want to live? To live in the “good”? I feel like this could be a whole post itself. I heard this quote on one of the blogs I listen to (can’t remember which one) “thriving not striving”. That’s the type of life I want to live, thriving where I am at, not striving to live there. But maybe a post for another time.
Question for you…
Are you sitting in church or bible study feeling lost in the church? Are you sitting with your core group of girlfriends, feeling lost in the mix and as though you are struggling and suffering on the inside?
Are you feeling as though you can’t share your secret because others will judge you? That they will say, “you’re a Christian, you shouldn’t be dealing with that!” Or how about, “You have such an amazing life, you have… and … you shouldn’t be worrying about that!”
When you take a light into a dark room, guess what… that room is not dark anymore! You can see where you are going, you can put away and step around the toys left lying around. You can see the crack in the window letting mosquitoes in that are silently coming at you and shut it.
When we bring light into a situation, light into a dark moment in our life, that darkness has to disappear because there cannot be darkness where there is light.
John 1:5 NIV The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it.
My prayer for you and myself is that we can be a friend, a sister, an acquaintance who can take notice of each other. Take notice of when our friends seem to be in a dark place. That are spirits can be in tune with those around us. Or that you can be bold enough to tell someone you are in a dark place.
Daughter, sister, friend, mother, the Bible tell us that we * “are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God’s special possession, so that we may declare the praises of Him who has called us out of darkness into His wonderful light”.
Did you catch the promise? He HAS CALLED YOU OUT, meaning, past tense you are already out of the darkness.
Grab onto that promise, you can get out of the darkness! Talk to someone! It’s okay to not be okay, but do something about it. Don’t stay in your funk.
* 1 Peter 2:9 NIV
“ But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God’s special possession, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light.”